Don’t Be Footloose With Argyle Socks

Color Clash: Soon we’ll be seeing the signs of autumn--cooler days, longer nights and argyle socks.

Argyles make a kind of casual, hip statement for the outwardly conservative but secretly rebellious. But there’s a difference between being a rebel and having questionable taste.

If you’ve believed the myth that argyles of any color go with any casual outfit, take note. An argyle with the wrong pants is an invitation to embarrassment.

“It’s best to stick with the rule about socks in general,” says John Berges of Berges Men’s Wear in San Clemente. “Try to tie the color scheme of the sock into the shirt you’re wearing. If you’re wearing a plain pant, you can wear a jazzy sock. If you’ve got a pair of striped slacks or a pant with a pattern on it, stick with a more understated, plainer sock.”

And no matter how much you become attached to your argyles, don’t make the mistake of wearing them with a suit. “They’re strictly for casual to dress-up casual clothes,” Berges says.

Chain, Shame, Shame: Men wearing gold chains around their necks are usually viewed as very macho or very chic depending on who they are, the number of buttons they’ve left undone on their shirts, and, perhaps more importantly, the width of their chains.

“The thicker the chain, the more the guy is living in 1977,” says gold jewelry designer Michelle Gray of Huntington Beach. “The thick gold chains are definitely out. If your chain is thicker than the wire used to connect stereo speakers, it’s probably time to get a new one.”

Gray says that a subtle, finer chain makes a sensual statement in the frugal, let’s-not-show-off ‘90s. “And whatever you do, just wear one chain. More than that, and you’re flirting with a disco look.”

Poor Polishes: A few years ago they were all the rage, but if you have any left, it’s probably time to send them to the nearest hazardous-waste disposal site.

Wild nail polishes in blue, orange, green and glow-in-the-dark shades shouldn’t be taking up space in your drawer.

“Those neon shades kind of fizzled out, fortunately,” says Belva Quigley of Belva’s Nails Naturally in Orange. “We’re back to paler shades, French-cut manicures and varying shades of red and orange.”

Another casualty of time is the long, sharp set of fingernails, which have hit the fashion dregs despite actress Michelle Pfeiffer’s creative use of long nails as Catwoman in “Batman Returns.”

“Most women want a comfortable, workable length,” Quigley says. “They don’t want a bird talon.”