JOLLY GREEN GIANTS

LA QUINTA — On the occasion of his new career as the most celebrated amateur golfer in the world (retired basketball player division), Michael Jordan chose a tasteful black shirt, tailored gray slacks with white accents and distinctive brown and black shoes, then accented the ensemble with a cigar longer than a three-pointer.

The tears might not have dried yet on the sidewalks of Chicago since he announced his retirement from the Bulls only a week ago, but there was Jordan at the tee Wednesday, ready to take a swing at his new life, surrounded by about 5,000 fans who showed up at Bermuda Dunes to watch him start the Bob Hope Chrysler Classic.

Let the record show he did all right.

“It was a lot of fun,” Jordan said just before he disappeared in a sea of fans wedged into a supposedly secure area between the yellow gallery ropes.

Actually, it was probably a lot safer there than anywhere close to Charles Barkley on the golf course. Barkley, who swings like someone trying to kill a cockroach, had Jordan flat on his back in laughter after knocking his ball over the grandstand on his approach to No. 18, their ninth hole. Barkley also drove his ball on No. 6 onto the No. 5 fairway, and generally played like someone severely directionally challenged.

Payne Stewart, the pro who played in the foursome with Jordan and Barkley, shook his head in mock terror when asked to describe Barkley’s swing.

“It’s pretty ugly,” he said.

Then there was Jordan. Curtis Strange, who has played with Jordan before, said he has a great swing, hits the ball a long way and needs only to practice to get a lot better.

Listed as a 10 handicap for the event, Jordan made six bogeys, two birdies, eight pars and picked up his ball twice in his group that, besides Stewart and Barkley, also included Roy Green, a former wide receiver with the Cardinals and Eagles. At the end of the round, after Jordan had sunk a 30-foot putt on the last hole, Barkley threw his arm around Green and said, “We’re still trying to figure out who you are.”

Everybody knew Jordan, and PGA Tour Commissioner Tim Finchem was more than happy to welcome him to the golf fold, full time or not (just show up on TV over the weekend, please!).

Finchem came close to popping the buttons on his blue blazer when he discussed the life of Jordan the golfer.

“I think everybody should think about golf the week after they retire, especially the greatest basketball player of all time,” Finchem said. “It’s a great attraction.”

Well, yes, he is. On the driving range, Barkley was asked to compare his golf game to Jordan’s and had to admit that Jordan’s was better, obvious to anyone who could tell straight from crooked.

“Obviously he’s a better liar too, masquerading with that 10 handicap,” he said.

Where Jordan goes from here down the golf road is unclear. There have been rumors that Jordan and Tiger Woods will play together at the AT&T; Pebble Beach Pro-Am in two weeks, but Jordan is supposed to have surgery Monday to repair a cut on his right index finger. He said he sliced himself with his cigar-cutter while vacationing in the Bahamas.

Now that’s a modern athlete’s injury, sort of like getting a paper cut from the wrapper on a stack of $100 bills. Anyway, Stewart said Jordan told him he would be out at least four weeks.

When Jordan birdied the second hole, he exclaimed, “And I did it with nine fingers.”

Barkley spent most of the day trying to keep track of his ball. But he really wasn’t surprised to be playing golf with Jordan because, he said, he’d known Jordan was going to retire. And the announcement wasn’t exactly kept secret, either.

“I got 500 TV stations at my home on the dish and he was on every one of them,” Barkley said.

Stewart said he enjoyed his five-hour-plus round, despite all the distractions. He wasn’t happy about shooting a one-under 71, but that’s celebrity golf. And he was especially gracious in his opinion of Jordan’s golf game.

“Michael has got some beautiful rhythm,” he said. “He works very hard. He’s just an exceptional athlete. When I saw the pairings, I was very excited. I knew I needed to focus and disregard the circus atmosphere. He did terrific. I’m sure it would be just as awkward for me to be on a basketball court.

“Michael Jordan is an icon. He needs more practice refining his short game, although he putted the ball extremely well. It’s just a matter of timing with him. . . .

“He’s got such a big arc, he can really generate a lot of clubhead speed.

“The thing with golf is, the more you practice, the better you get--except for Charles.”

The gallery following Jordan thinned out on the back side, but the enthusiasm was not dimmed.

And in the morning, traffic was jammed on the way into Bermuda Dunes with fans hoping to make Jordan’s tee time. For today’s second round, the Jordan-Barkley group is paired at Tamarisk with John Daly. Yeah, that will calm things down.

BOB HOPE CHRYSLER CLASSIC: John Huston and Ben Bates, in a three-way tie for the lead at 63, did what they had to do at benign Indian Wells. Page 8