If You’re Reading This Behind the Wheel, at Least Put That Cell Phone Down

Honk if you’re an L.A. driver. Chances are you don’t need much encouragement. In a survey by the Steel Alliance, a group of steel producers, 39% of L.A. drivers said they blasted their horn in the previous month, compared with 26% for the nation.

Why all the noise? They were in a hurry. Seventy-two percent said they drove 10 mph or more over the speed limit during that period, 12% over the national average. But, of course, their hands weren’t always on the horn. Fifty-five percent of L.A. drivers said they spoke on a cell phone without a headset, compared with 36% nationwide.

Nevertheless, in the rudeness category, L.A. drivers received a B, not as polite as Seattle’s, which received an A, but far above Miami’s and Boston’s, which got Fs.

I tell you, if drivers in Miami and Boston are that much worse than L.A.’s, I’m not visiting those cities until their drivers agree to repeat their driver’s education courses.

L.A. got high marks because a comparatively small number of Angeleno motorists--35%--admitted committing four or more aggressive acts on the road in the previous month. Honking obviously doesn’t fall into that category.

Actually, it does seem like it’s been a while since I’ve seen one of those bumper stickers that say, “Keep Honking; I’m Reloading.”

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Guide to Adventurous Dining: Today’s selections (see accompanying) include:

A cereal that is anything but a happy meal (submitted by Doris Walden of Palm Desert).

A pastry dough that doesn’t want any trouble (from D.H. of Glendale).

Some eggs that are served via heavy machinery (from Jon McKenzie of Bellflower).

And, an Arkansas restaurant that seemingly discriminates against bovine visitors (snapped by Marilyn Fils of Tarzana). Actually, the name of the establishment is the Purple Cow.

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On the road: David Lowe of Long Beach forwarded this police log item from the Carmel Pine Cone (which is a newspaper, not a pine cone): “Resident reported his mother was yelling at him for not cleaning his room. Both were counseled. No further action was taken.”

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Unclear on the concept: Raelyn Morgan of Gardena saw the book “1,001 Free Things” advertised for $24.95, plus shipping, handling and taxes.

miscelLAny: David Terlinden noticed a store window ad that described a bed as “kinsize.” Obviously, Terlinden says, it’s “big enough for the whole family.”

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012 and by e-mail at steve.har [email protected].