A manual transmission neophyte decides to stick it to stop signs

Continuing our never-ending discussion of stupid driver tricks, John Bellah, a cop at Cal State Long Beach, recalled the time he pulled over a woman who had run through a stop sign in a pickup.

“Her excuse,” Bellah said, “was that she had borrowed the truck, which had a manual transmission (remember those?). Anyway, as she couldn’t drive a stick shift, she didn’t bother with stopping at stop signs.”

Dancing for dollars: Dr. Mort Scribner of Monrovia noticed an accountant who can cheer you up with music after you see how much money you owe at tax time (see photo).

A really large bundle of joy: Rick Webb of Riverside found more proof that babies are getting bigger every year (see photo).

They left their hearts in L.A.: Someone in San Francisco speaking fondly of the City of Angels? It was an insurance company advertising in a Southern California newspaper. I guess, in its desperate search for business, it was willing to risk the censure of the neighbors back home (see accompanying).

Department of Redundancy Department: Kenny Larsen saw a sign in Alhambra that prompted him to reflect that he couldn’t ever recall hearing an inaudible alarm (see photo).

Tough to stomach: When a drawing of Ontario’s planned sports arena was unveiled, some onlookers quipped that the planners must be counting on heavy beer sales, the Inland Valley Daily Bulletin reported. Reason: Several areas were label “vomitory.”

But, the newspaper pointed out, though one definition of the word is “inducing vomit,” another is a passage at a stadium through which spectators are discharged.

I did a little reading on this subject and found that some stadium folk around the country prefer to use the nickname “vom.”

A true Hollywood marriage: John Hendry of Van Nuys heard a TV producer tell a KCRW radio interviewer that he was “in the second year of my marriage -- and it’s still all golden.” Commented Hendry: “I guess his wife ‘picked up his option’ for year three.”

miscelLAny: Writing about the woes of showbiz, I mentioned an actor who thought he’d have a role with several lines of dialogue on an MTV show, only to learn that all he was supposed to say was “Eek!” While wearing a turtle costume. As if that discovery wasn’t challenging enough for him, I misspelled his name. It’s Larry Soronen, not Sorensen. Excuse me while I crawl back into my shell.

Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012, and by e-mail at [email protected].